I watched the DVD of The Kite Runner the other night. My review after the jump.
Are you kidding me? This movie is just pathetic. It’s long, dull, boring, tedious, self-important, and humorless. It’s impossible to care about the protagonist because he’s a pretentious asshole.
This is the story of a spoiled privileged brat who grows up to be terminally boring author whining about the tragic consequences of childish decisions. It’s hard to sympathize with a main character that, literally, goes out of his way to be a jerk (the hiding the watch scene). There’s just nothing pleasant about this character. It’s not just that he has no virtue, it’s that he never really learns or grows. I suppose his journey back is supposed to be evidence of his growth, he exposes himself to danger. Would a coward (his humiliating childhood secret is an act of cowardice) put himself into such danger!? Wellllll, remember that he didn’t want to, he only does it out of some misplaced concept of family, AND he has to be saved by a child, just as he was saved by a child when he was a child. If he were any more ineffectual his character would have to be renamed Inspector Clouseau.
The real interesting story here, which is not addressed, is just what did the father do to his son to turn him into such a callow, insipid, navel-gazer.
I can’t believe this received the praise which it did. Perhaps the book is better, though I couldn’t bring myself to get past the first fifty pages or so.
One star because it pissed me off so much.
